C: is that paint in your hair?
Me: *checks ponytail*
Me: nope, just dried toothpaste from this morning
[story of my life]
Sunday, July 13, 2014
Bay Area humor
Me: where's home for you?
A: San Fran
Me: ...You sure about that?
(Only ppl from the bay would understand the irony)
A: San Fran
Me: ...You sure about that?
(Only ppl from the bay would understand the irony)
Monday, June 23, 2014
Come clean
(At target)
H: I need to buy more laundry detergent, I'm running out
Me: ... We don't share?
H: I need to buy more laundry detergent, I'm running out
Me: ... We don't share?
Monday, May 12, 2014
Metro Rail
On the subway, a bum with one leg was standing next to me... Lost his balance and knocked me over in the process. A (handsome) man in a suit helped pull him back up. If this was a real sitcom, that man would have helped me up, checked to see if I was ok, and we'd be going out in the near future... But alas this is real life and all he did was look at me to confirm I was ok with a nod and exited at the next stop.
Just a typical Monday morning in the life of Lyn.
Just a typical Monday morning in the life of Lyn.
Friday, May 9, 2014
Kaiser
In the Kaiser waiting room.
Nurse: Senor Castillo, we are ready for you
Me: *looks around, no one else is in the waiting room except me...*
I got my tetanus shot in my arm and it was SORE. sore sore sore. I went to work that night.
A: *grabs my arm, right where my shot is* Lyn!! I haven't seen you in so long!! I've missed you! *continues to shake me*
Me: OWWWWW, my tetanus shot *lifts sleeve to show bandaid and swollen area*
Nurse: Senor Castillo, we are ready for you
Me: *looks around, no one else is in the waiting room except me...*
I got my tetanus shot in my arm and it was SORE. sore sore sore. I went to work that night.
A: *grabs my arm, right where my shot is* Lyn!! I haven't seen you in so long!! I've missed you! *continues to shake me*
Me: OWWWWW, my tetanus shot *lifts sleeve to show bandaid and swollen area*
Smashed
My poor poor index fingers have been to hell and back.
Scene 1:
Walked into a patient's room. The doors at my hospital are HEAVY, like lead door heavy. The entire door smashed my left hand's index finger and instantly a million blot clots appeared on my finger.
Me: Sorry, I'll be right back
Parent: Ok
Me: *Slyly walks out the door, once it closes, I scream/grunt at the top of my lungs because it hurts like a mother*
Yep, my finger definitely was a swollen mess, it turned black/purple under the nail, and the blot clots were more prominent. I felt like ET because my finger was pulsating all night.
Scene 2 (the next morning):
Me: omg look at my finger, it's worst
N: *smacks it*
Me: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!
N: I forgot it hurt! I thought you were just pointing at me and we were playing a game!
Scene 3:
Opening a window because my toast is burning, somehow pinched the finger pad of the index finger on my RIGHT hand.
Now my other index finger is also swollen and has a disgusting huge black blood clot.
Scene 1:
Walked into a patient's room. The doors at my hospital are HEAVY, like lead door heavy. The entire door smashed my left hand's index finger and instantly a million blot clots appeared on my finger.
Me: Sorry, I'll be right back
Parent: Ok
Me: *Slyly walks out the door, once it closes, I scream/grunt at the top of my lungs because it hurts like a mother*
Yep, my finger definitely was a swollen mess, it turned black/purple under the nail, and the blot clots were more prominent. I felt like ET because my finger was pulsating all night.
Scene 2 (the next morning):
Me: omg look at my finger, it's worst
N: *smacks it*
Me: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!
N: I forgot it hurt! I thought you were just pointing at me and we were playing a game!
Scene 3:
Opening a window because my toast is burning, somehow pinched the finger pad of the index finger on my RIGHT hand.
Now my other index finger is also swollen and has a disgusting huge black blood clot.
Thursday, April 17, 2014
Roommate stuff
Having a roommate has turned my hot mess issues up a notch.
Exhibit A: Brush hour
Usually, I use my Sonicare but occasionally I use a regular toothbrush. Our toothbrush holder usually only has my roommate's toothbrush in it. One day, I put my regular toothbrush in the holder. Later I talk to my roommate to find out that we both have been using the purple one since we both thought the pink brush belonged to the other roommate. Great.
Exhibit B: Please count your eggs before they hatch
Communication is KEY. We usually buy our own food, but with basics that tend to go bad fast, we share. My roommate bought a dozen eggs. Then I bought a dozen eggs. Then my roommate forgot about the first dozen eggs. We ended up with 36 eggs.
Exhibit A: Brush hour
Usually, I use my Sonicare but occasionally I use a regular toothbrush. Our toothbrush holder usually only has my roommate's toothbrush in it. One day, I put my regular toothbrush in the holder. Later I talk to my roommate to find out that we both have been using the purple one since we both thought the pink brush belonged to the other roommate. Great.
Exhibit B: Please count your eggs before they hatch
Communication is KEY. We usually buy our own food, but with basics that tend to go bad fast, we share. My roommate bought a dozen eggs. Then I bought a dozen eggs. Then my roommate forgot about the first dozen eggs. We ended up with 36 eggs.
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